Valerie Rutherford (fireflys_locket) wrote,
Valerie Rutherford

Skilled Writing

Yesterday, I got a lot of things done. I did four loads of laundry. I finally finished A Game of Thrones. Most importantly, I wrote a 10-page chapter of Dreaming in Shadow. I was proud of myself because getting back to seriously writing after a few weeks is always hard. But my goodness, I stressed myself out.

After a few weeks of mostly worrying about still far-off things like editors and future books, I ended up worrying about the actual writing again. I had a simple concept of the chapter for so very many years, but things started happening that I hadn't expected. Suddenly, characters were talking about really important things that the main character (and the reader) aren't supposed to understand until the end of the book. I was watching my hand write out dialogue that had me wanting to shout, "Don't give away the big plot twist, [enter character name here]!"

Hopefully, I ended up writing a conversation that doesn't give much away but upon a reread reveals another meaning. But I just keep worrying that I'm not a skilled enough writer to pull that off. Especially, with a scene that I hadn't planned for ages, the way I usually write important scenes. Sometimes, I just don't even feel I deserve to be a writer. I'm a creator, and I love - adore - my ideas, but will I ever be skilled enough to write something that can even begin to compare to writers I admire? Will I ever be someone's favorite writer? Will anyone buy my books at all? Will they be even worth buying?

That's what stresses me, at the moment.
Tags: dreaming in shadow, writing

  • Growing in My Ashes

    When we talk about rebirth, a phoenix rising from its ashes, it's one explosive event that leaves you forever changed. Fresh and pure in a new life…

  • The Entire Ocean

    I don't know everything about my universe. Writers talk about being plotters (who plan every detail before writing) or pantsers (who start…

  • Birthdays and Introverted Natures

    Birthdays are rough for me. I always find myself drowning in sad memories and obsessing over the painful and lonely future I worry is ahead. It hurts…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.