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Christmas. Huh.

Christmas is only 10 days away. So far, I haven't had a huge breakdown. Or maybe that's what happened last month when I watched those old Christmas concerts. Maybe it has already passed.

To be honest, I've had a few nice moments in the last week, where I was almost happy with Christmas. A week ago, when my Uncle Jim came in, Jan had us all over for a little family dinner. Jan's house was beautifully decorated, and when I walked in, I was excited. Then, on Friday, my Mom, Jan, and I went over to our cousin Gilda's for a fabulous lunch. Both of these events were great because they were with family, yet weren't too crowded for me. I never end up going anywhere on Christmas, because the places I could go are overly crowded. I guess I really just want something in between crowded and alone. (Or maybe I just want Morgan...)

Tuesday, I spent most of my day with Jan baking cookies. It was so much fun. We made the iced sugar cookies I remember her bringing when I was little. This year, I actually worked hard to make them and other cookies, which is something I've been looking forward to since I knew Jan and Paul would be moving here.

So, as weird as it seems, I guess you could say I'm enjoying the season... more than I have for about 10 years, at least. The only sad part - besides not having Morgan - is that Grandma is gone. I keep having random thoughts of her, where, for a moment, I think my heart is going to break open. But I ease the thoughts to the side, because I have so many things I need to do. Probably, when everyone is off to their Christmas parties, I'll have a little cry alone.



( 4 comments — Leave a comment )
Dec. 16th, 2011 08:12 pm (UTC)
I'm glad that things are looking a little better holiday-wise! :) And cookies are always a plus.
Dec. 16th, 2011 09:32 pm (UTC)
Except when you're able to eat too many, and have to worry you're going gain back ALL of the weight you lost over the last few years. ^_^; But yeah, thanks. Hehe.

How are your holidays going so far? I finally started reading Monstrosity, but it's been so hard to find time to read lately. As sad as it sounds, when I'm busy or distracted, reading is the first thing to get cut. But I like the story so far! <3
Dec. 17th, 2011 02:47 am (UTC)
Ahaha, don't I know it. :P And they're going well, thanks! I just finished my last final exam this afternoon, so I'm finally free of this semester. :) And I'm glad you're enjoying Monstrosity so far! It's still painful for me to go back over the earliest chapters... so long ago. D:
Dec. 17th, 2011 03:02 am (UTC)
I know what you mean. I've been working a good part of this year on my next chapter of Hate You, Hate Me, because I'm working from my 8th grade notebook. So painful... it's just awful. Haha. But hopefully, it will turn out well. Eventually.
( 4 comments — Leave a comment )