The Diary of Firefly's Lake

What kind of Nerd am I?

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Sun, 20 Dec 2009 19:51:34 GMT

ANIME/MANGA NERD
[X] You watch anime.
[X] You read manga.
[X] You buy/collect anime DVDs or manga volumes.
[X] You own some other form of anime/manga merchandise.
[ ] You have referred to an anime character as 'hot' before.
[ ] You have cosplayed.
[ ] You have done so in public.
[X] You have been to an anime/manga convention.
[ ] You have created/joined a fanclub for an anime/manga character.
[ ] You have created/joined a hateclub for an anime/manga character.
[ ] You have squealed when you found out somebody had the same name as an anime character you knew.
[ ] You enjoy drawing anime. [X] People you know know you as the 'anime' person.
[X] You know that it is pronounced 'mawnguh' and not 'manga' like it is spelled.
ANIME/MANGA POINTS: 7/14

ART NERD
[X] You like art.
[ ] You actually consider yourself an artist.
[ ] When using art supplies, the brand of them matters to you.
[ ] You have a favorite brand.
[ ] You have asked for art supplies as a Christmas/birthday gift before.
[ ] You give people your drawings as gifts.
[ ] People actually ask for your drawings.
[ ] You are known as 'the art person' at your school.
[ ] Instead of just 'brown' or ' pink', you'd be specific; it's 'sienna brown' or 'blush pink'.
[ ] You have taken an art class outside of school.
[ ] You have considered a career as an artist.
[ ] Your school papers are always covered in doodles.
[ ] You have a favorite artist.
[ ] Your drawings have been framed.
[ ] You carry a sketchbook with you everywhere you go.
ART NERD POINTS: 1/15

MUSICAL NERD
[ ] You play a musical instrument.
[ ] You play more than one instrument.
[ ] You actually really enjoy playing your instrument.
[ ] You've given your instrument a name.
[ ] You've participated in an extracurricular activity for your instrument.
[ ] You are known by what you play. \
[X] You listen to classical music.
[ ] You are wondering whether that refers to the classical music genre or the classical music time period.
[ ] You have a favorite composer.
[ ] All of your friends are from your band/orchestra class.
[X] You write music.
[ ] You've had discussions with your friends about music; your favorite composers/instruments/musical time periods/key/etc...
[ ] You have considered a professional career with your instrument.
[ ] You are never nervous playing for other people.
MUSICAL NERD POINTS: 2/14

VIDEO GAME NERD
[X] You play video games.
[X] You own more than 4 different video game systems.
[ ] You've had debates over which system is the greatest.
[ ] You play video games every day.
[X] You have played a video game for over 10 hours.
[X] You have songs from your favorite video games on your MP3.
[X] You love to talk about video games.
[X] You memorize the dates for when a new game is being released.
[ ] People know you as the 'gamer' person.
[X] You spend more time on video games than you do hanging out with friends.
[X] Your gaming system is in your room.
[X] You have preferences when it comes to what company your game came from.
[ ] You've had debates over which company is the best.
[X] You keep playing a game until you beat it.
[ ] It makes you angry when you found out somebody looked up cheat codes on the internet to beat their game.
VIDEO GAME NERD POINTS: 10/15

COMPUTER NERD
[X] You use the computer every day.
[X] You have an account/username on some sort of social website.
[ ] You go into random internet chatrooms.
[X] You spend at least 2 hours a day on the computer.
[X] You use computer faces; : D XD XP D: ^_^ >.> and etc.
[X] It is hard to go a day without using the computer.
[ ] You spend time in online forums.
[ ] In the forum/chatroom you use, you are known there by everyone else.
[X] You have friends you have only met online.
[ ] You have/had a girlfriend/boyfriend you have only met online.
[ ] You have actually met an online friend in person.
[ ] U cn ezly rd 'txttlk.
[ ] You have said 'lol' or 'omg' in speech that is not online.
[ ] You can type really, really fast.
COMPUTER NERD POINTS: 6/14

Take if you wish, Dearies. ^_^

Final Fantasy 8

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 17:38:12 GMT

So, browsing around on GameSpot (mostly voting on their year end awards), I found that Final Fantasy 8 is coming to PSN. I never actually finished FF8. I was playing it during one of the most hectic times of my life aka early 2005. And I just never went back to it. I finished FF9, got to the end of FF7, and of course, have played through the newer ones, but for some reason... anytime I think of playing Final Fantasy 8, I decide not to. It isn't because I didn't like what I played of it... so, it really must be the memories attached to it. Not that all of those memories are bad, even. It makes me think of Christen too, but... that was such an upsetting time.

Anyways, I'm starting to think... it's coming on 5 years since I left school and all. Maybe, it's time to just start over. Maybe it would be theraputic.

Forever Memories

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 17:19:03 GMT

I really wanted a way to make VHS tapes into DVD. I used to record all sorts of stuff... and now I have like a hundred or so tapes. No, seriously. I've labeled through 45, and I'm only, maybe, half done. But anyways, while I'm not planning on transferring all of those... in fact, probably not most of them, there are some I definitely want to save.

Anyways, my Mommy and StepFather found me a DVD/VHS recorder that let me do just that, and they got it for me for Christmas. YaY! It works great. It looked like it would be really complicated, but for what I wanted to do, it was pretty easy. I made two copies of my baby tapes. Haha. One is for my Daddy for Christmas. As for everything else, I'll have to sort things first.

I also just ordered an awesome little thing that will let me plug three things into my TV and flip between them. Seeing as I now have a DVD player, Wii, and PS3 that all need the same plugs, this will be very useful. The Xbox 360 has a different cable, so it's always plugged it. Switching between the PS3 and the Wii has been very annoying, though. So problem solved, hopefully.

So, yeah... haven't been posting. Sorry. I'm, at least, going to start up posting through old things from my real journal again soon. Hopefully.

According to my dreams...

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 22:13:09 GMT

I have a lot of interesting dreams. I'm also pretty good at remembering them. A lot of my story ideas end up coming from dreams. But sometimes, I just have weird fandom-ish dreams. So, since I haven't posted in awhile I thought I'd let people in on a few things that are *going to happen... according to my dreams... from the last couple of days.

1. Giant Bomb.com is going to have a Persona 4 Endurance Run convention tour. It will be awesome.

2. The next Sims 3 expansion pack will be Carnival/Pets based. It will take the carnival-y stuff from Makin' Magic and bring it back. It will also include pets, which can be trained for performing tricks at said carnival.

3. Chris Noth will guest star on Heroes. (The only reason I know about this actor is from how much my Grandma likes him, so I'll have to let her in on this one, though I think Heroes is probably to violent for her. Actually, it's too violent for me too, but... oh, well, too late on that one.)

*Some restrictions apply. Results may vary.

Maggie's Power Supply Transplant

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 01:45:58 GMT

Computer is fixed!! ...I think.

Maggie's Critical Condition

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 03:04:24 GMT

Magnolia (my computer) is in critical condition. Stay tuned for more information/my desent into insanity.

PS: This year is terrible.

Worldwide Day of Play

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 18:06:06 GMT

I find it ironic that every year during Nickelodeon's Worldwide Day of Play thing that is supposed to get kids outside to excercise and such, it always rains here. Always. I would have gone for a walk or something too.

I have to say I appreciate the effort, though. They shut the whole channel off for a few hours every year. That's dedication to the cause.

Meanwhile, I'm going to continue being a bad example by staying in and watching Giant Bomb's Endurance Run. Hey, it's rainy, okay?

Fall is Here

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 01:33:43 GMT

It's hard to believe, but... I'm having a good week. My seemingly annual Fall inspiration is kicking in full force. I'm getting more writing done, more flowing of ideas, and having more vivid, lucid dreaming. It's been like this for a few years now, but this seems like the largest scale so far. I think it's partly because I'm so HAPPY to be rid of my awful Summer.

Either way, I'm looking forward to a very productive October. For me, anyways. ^_^

Genius Squees

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 18:54:52 GMT

Sooo, about 10 days ago, I was practically in tears over not being able to record Genius when it aired on Disney again. Luckily, I was able to find someone who was willing to make me a copy of it, and several other Disney Channel movies, he had recorded onto DVD from satellite. They came today and are great quality! So I went from tears to squees.

Squuueee. ^_^

NANA Part 1

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 03:06:21 GMT

NANA part 1 came in the mail today! I'm super excited... but at the same time, I feel pretty sure that I'm too used to and in love with the Japanese version to enjoy the English version that much. Usually, I love English dubs, but this is a special case. So I'm kind of scared to watch it.

I do think that the Hachi voice actress will be great. I mean she plays Barbie in the Barbie movies (which I tend to love, so shush.). And isn't Hachi just a little Japanese Barbie doll? On the other hand, she does Sango in InuYasha, so I feel like she can do the more serious side of Hachi too.

I'm going to try to watch the English version at least once all the way through. I have to give it a chance. Of course, even if I don't care for it... and even if I'm too used to the fansubs to even like the official subs (this was the case with The Girl who Leapt Through Time), I'm happy to legitimately own NANA. <3 I should really be doing that with the manga more too. Even though I hate thinking I'm supporting the people who translated volume 2. ~_~; Nana, man. Ugh. I really hope it's gotten better since then.

Genius Tears

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 07:50:50 GMT

Genius, my favorite Disney Channel movie is on. In fact, it's one of my favorite movies, period. I watched it like a million times... to the point that I'm scared that the tape I recorded it on ages ago is going to die, so I never watch it anymore. Kind of defeating the purpose.

Since getting this computer, I was really hoping it would be on again sometime so I could record it into a file. But it didn't come on and didn't come on. Finally, it does, but my Media Center hasn't been working with my tv tuner for months. :(

When I saw it was on... I actually started crying. This is so unfair. Why now? *Sighs*

Meme-ology

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Sat, 15 Aug 2009 19:23:07 GMT

FOODOLOGY

What is your salad dressing of choice?
I don't really like dressing.

What is your favorite sit-down restaurant?
Eat N' Park.

What food could you eat for 2 weeks straight and not get sick of?
Pita pizza.

What are your pizza toppings of choice?
Cheese. And only cheese.

TECHNOLOGY

What color is your cell phone?
Blue and silver.

Do you have a laptop?
No.

How many email addresses do you have?
Three? I only really use one.

Do you use facebook from your phone?
No.

Do you use an alarm clock to wake up?
I use my phone on the rare occasion that I have to wake up at a certain time.

BIOLOGY

Are you right-handed or left-handed?
Right-handed.

Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
No.

What is the last heavy item you lifted?
Hm. I don't remember.

Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
Sort of. Fell off a trampoline and... yeah. Just for a second or two.

If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
Maybe. Well, only if knowing would help me to prepare.

If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
I wouldn't. I like my name.

Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
No way.

DUMBOLOGY

How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
5.

Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
Never. o.o;

Last person you talked to?
Mommy.

Last person you hugged?
Mommy.

FAVORITOLOGY

Season?
Fall.

Holiday?
Halloween.

Day of the week?
Thursday.

Month?
Hm. I don't know.

CURRENTOLOGY

Missing someone?
Always.

Mood?
...let's not.

What are you listening to?
Justin Lassen.

Watching?
Nothing.

Worrying about?
Everything. As always.

RANDOMOLOGY

First place you went to this morning?
Kitchen.

What's the last movie you saw?
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.

Do you smile often?
No.

Do you always answer your phone?
If I know who's calling, then yes. Otherwise, I never answer.

It's four in the morning and you get a text message, who is it?
No idea.

If you could change your eye color what would it be?
I like my eyes.

What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic?
Never been there.

Do you own a digital camera?
Yes.

Have you ever had a pet fish?
No.

What's on your wish list for your birthday?
My birthday wasn't that long ago, so... nothing yet. Morgan, but I hope to get him before then...

Can you do push ups?
Not really.

Can you do pull ups?
No.

Does the future make you more nervous or excited?
Nervous. :(

Do you have any saved texts?
Yes. I save too much.

Ever been in a car wreck?
No.

Do you have an accent?
Uh, no? Maybe to someone else? That's a weird question.

What was the last song to make you cry?
I don't remember. I cry to music a lot, but the last week is blurry.

When was the last time you cried?
Yesterday.

Plans tonight?
...none.

Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom?
Yes.

Name 3 things you bought yesterday?
Nothing.

Current hate right now?
Panic attacks.

Met someone who changed your life?
Yes.

How did you bring in the new year?
I don't remember... probably didn't even notice it.

What song represents you?
Anna Nalick - In my Head.

Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?
Maybe. But I don't think I'd want to change much, I'd just watch. Memorize. But mostly, I just want to get to the future with Morgan.

Does anyone love you?
My family and friends... hopefully. ^_^;

Would you be a pirate?
No. I don't like boats.

What songs do you sing in the shower?
I always listen to the radio, but I don't usually sing. Sometimes, when an old song I love comes on... or if I'm trying desperately to avoid a panic attack. ~_~;

Ever had someone sing to you?
No.

Do you like to cuddle?
I wouldn't know...

Have you held hands with anyone today?
No.

Who was the last person you took a picture of?
I can't remember. Me, I guess. Ick.

What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school?
Pop-ness, mostly.

Are most of the friends in your life new or old?
Old.

Do you like pulpy orange juice?
I don't like any orange juice, so no.

What is something your friends make fun of you for?
Obsessiveness with finding my soulmate, and how "perfect" I want him to be.

Have you ever ridden on an elephant?
Uh, no.

What are you saving your money up for right now?
Video games.

When is the last time you ate peanut butter and jelly?
Never.

What song(s) do you want played at your funeral?
Ones that represent my relationship with Morgan.

What were you doing 12 AM last night?
Attempting to sleep.

Really Long Question Set

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Fri, 07 Aug 2009 19:25:54 GMT

Do you think its bad for teenage girls to get on birth control?
Better than doing stuff without it...

When was the last time that you were genuinely happy?
...I don't know.

If you took a drug test right now, would you pass?
Yes.

Have you ever snuggled with someone you weren't dating?
I haven't dated, but still... no.

What do you think about abortions?
Very against them.

You're drunk stumbling through the streets, slurring songs, who are you with?
Would never happen.

Is it usually easy for someone to make you smile?
Smile... or really smile? I have no idea.

Do you like silver or gold better?
Silver.

Do you know anyone who smokes pot?
...unfortunately. *Sighs*

Does it matter to you if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?
Yes... Morgan could drink as long as it was too much or too often.

Is the last person you texted single?
Yes.

Your best friend randomly starts hating you. What do you do?
Cry.

Was last night terrible?
Yes, pretty much.

Has a boy sat on your bed before?
Cray? So, yes. I guess so.

Are you looking for a boyfriend/girlfriend?
I'm looking for my soulmate, Morgan.

What were you doing 12 AM last night?
Crying.

Does it make you mad when people stare at you?
Mad? No. Upset, yes.

Who was the last person you had a conversation with on the phone?
My Grandma.

What do you currently hear right now?
Nick on TV.

Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?
Fashion Bug.

Do you wish you never dated someone you dated?
Not applicable.

Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with a T?
No.

What was a highlight of your day?
Talking to Christen. Though it was brief. :(

What's your next tattoo?
I don't even have a first one.

Do you curse in front of your parents?
I don't curse in front of anyone.

Have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?
No... but I pretend to every night. :(

What are you doing tonight?
Being upset.

Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
Yes... and no. It depends on the crime.

Ever seen your best friend cry?
Yes.

Have you ever played a Wii?
^_^ I have one. So, yes.

Who did you last talk to for longer then 10 minutes on the phone?
Grandma.

Where were you at 2:00 this morning?
Here.

Are your parents home?
No.

What's something that bothers you about girls?
Depends on the girl? In general... too obsessed with looks.

How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking?
No often. Words just spill out from me. I only hold back if it's not important and would hurt someone if said.

Would you ever dye you hair blonde?
i considered it... but probably not anymore.

Is it hard leaving people behind?
I don't leave anyone. They leave me.

Do you prefer warm or cold weather?
Fall weather! ^_^

How's your life lately?
Horrible.

Have you ever been arrested?
No.

Does anyone know your Facebook/LiveJournal/etc. password?
No.

Do you believe in love?
Absolutely.

Do you curse a lot?
No.

Did you mean it when you said "I love you" last?
Yes, of course.

What is the latest you've stayed up in the past week?
Haha. There is no "late" to me. Time is circular.

Plans for tomorrow?
None.

If you had to choose someone to sleep next to every night, and wake up to who would it be?
Morgan. <3 :(

Is there a difference between love and being in love?
yes.

Are you someone's best friend?
...I hope.

Are you taller than your mom?
No, sadly.

How long until your next birthday?
Don't talk about those.

What time did you go to sleep last night?
4:30 AM-ish. But not for long.

Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you, but spelled differently?
No.

What color is your shirt?
Pink.

Would you rather have long or short hair
Long.

Do you hate being alone?
Sometimes, when safe at home... but never otherwise. And even still, I'm far too lonely.

What's your favorite season of the year?
Used to be Spring, but probably Fall now.

Do you miss anyone?
Always.

Are you wearing jeans right now?
I never wear jeans. So, no.

Are any of your friends virgins?
Yes.

Day been rough?
Yes, but I've had worse.

How do you type your smileys?
^_^

How often do you straighten your hair?
When Christen wants to play hairstylist. :P

What does your mom/dad do that really pisses you off?
Uh, I wouldn't put it that way... my Dad often doesn't show up or follow through with stuff. it rarely makes me mad anymore... just sad.

What color is your hair?
red. ^_^

What was your last call for?
To or from? I called my Grandma to save myself from being alone after my mom went to bed. Don't remember who called last.

Do you look decent when you wake up?
No.

Do you think relationships are hard?
It depends on the people.

Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life?
I hope so.

If you were in the hospital would your best friend come see you?
...I hope so.

Does seeing couples in love make you mad?
Not mad... sad. Depressively jealous. But not mad.

Is there someone that ALWAYS makes you happy whenever you see or talk?
No one ALWAYS... lots of usuallys, though.

What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?
...I wouldn't be with someone unless it was Morgan. Morgan would never cheat on me or he wouldn't be Morgan, therefore this question doesn't work.

What are you going to do after this?
Attempt to dry my hair without crying the whole time.

Do you make eye contact when you talk to people?
Rarely, but it's not on purpose.

Do you wear make up?
rarely.

If so, what kind and what do you wear?
Lipgloss.

How much longer until you get what you want more than anything?
...I wish I knew. :( Waiting is terrible.

Is anyone falling for you?
Doubtful.

Is the last person you hugged older than you?
Yes.

What was the last song you sang along to?
It's blurry right now.

Do you believe that you can change for someone?
Yes, to a certain degree. Someone can definitely be your catalyst.

Last non-alcoholic beverage consumed?
Water.

Has anyone upset you in the last week?
Yes.

Are you sarcastic?
HeH.

Where is your phone?
On my desk.

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?
Not likely.

Have you ever had an orange thrown at you?
o.O; No.

What is/was your favorite subject in school?
English.

Park or the beach?
Park.

Do you like cheese?
Yes. ^_^

Have you ever read something by Shakespeare?
Yes.

If so, what was it and did you like it?
Romeo and Juliet. The concept, yes... but I don't really like reading plays.

Know any other languages?
A little Japanese from anime. A little French from school... the very little I retained. *Sighs*

Have you ever searched Google Earth?
Yes.

If so, did you search for your own house?
Yes.

How many people do you know named Ashley?
...I don't know. No one comes to mind.

Are you hungry right now?
Kind of.

Favorite animal?
Too hard. :( I love them all so much. Hedgies and kitties the most?

What website do you visit the most?
Neopets. Then LiveJournal.

Do you like Paramore?
What I've heard, yes.

Have you ever tried to make somebody jealous?
Haha. Yes, sadly. ~_~;

Have you ever fallen asleep in school?
Once in preschool because of this medicine patch... ~_~;

Taken any medication in the past 24 hours?
Yes.

Play a musical instrument?
Nope.

Who's the person who hurt you the most?
Seth.

Have you ever been so angry you cried?
Yes.

What do you do when you need to calm down?
Watch Noggin channel (aka little kids shows) or similiar. Play The Sims 2.

Do you believe there is a place after life?
Yes.

What would you do if there was a mouse in your room?
^_^ Squee with happiness?

What was your last thought before you went to sleep last night?
:(

How do you feel right now?
Not great, but thankful for the focus on this.

What were you doing at 7:00am?
Attempting to sleep.

What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning?
Just... a sad feeling.

What's on your mind?
Morgan. :(

Do you get distracted easily?
Not usually.

What is the last thing that you wrote on?
...notebook?

Does it bother you when someone lies to you?
very much.

Do you always care what you look like?
Yes and no. I care about... some things.

Is there anything youre wondering about?
Yes.

Have you ever showered with someone?
o.O; No.

Did you have sex in the past week?
No. Never.

Do you wish you were somewhere else right now?
In Morgan's arms? other than that, no.

What were you doing an hour ago?
Talking to Emily.

What’s the worst way to say I love you?
Uh, I don't know.

What are you doing tomorrow?
Probably the same as today.

Other than yours who's bed were you on last?
Mommy's, I'm sure.

Does that person mean something to you?
Yes.

What did you do for Valentine's Day?
...I honestly can't remember. Did I block it out? Did I sleep through it? No idea.

Is there somebody in your life that you could not survive without?
A few, yes.

Were you single on your last birthday?
Didn't I ask you not to talk about that? ~_~; On every birthday, yes.

Who was the last person to cook for you?
Joe, I guess. I usually cook for myself.

Will you talk to someone on the phone tonight?
Maybe Grandma.

Are you anyone's first love?
Highly unlikely.

When is the next time you will kiss someone?
Next time? I've never.

You have to walk home from school/work, how long does it take?
Don't have either.

Do you hate the last girl you were talking to?
No.

Did you wake up in the middle of the night last night?
Yes.

Can you see a cat from where you're sitting?
i wish!

Are you ticklish?
I HATE being tickled. ~_~;

Would you be able to date someone who doesn't make you laugh?
Laugh? Uh, I'd like to laugh with Morgan when appropiate. ^_^

What's the biggest annoyance in your life right now?
Annoyance doesn't really cover it.

How many hours did you sleep last night?
2, maybe. ~_~;

How many mirrors do you have in your room?
One.

How tall are you? Are you comfortable with that?
5'6. Yes.

Why did your last relationship fail?
Never had one.

Would you care if a lot of people liked your boy/girlfriend? Why or why not?
Yes. Because I'd be paranoid. ~_~;

Would you honestly say you'd risk your life for someone?
It's not really a choice. It's just... what happens.

What is your current wallpaper on your cell phone?
Fireflies.

The last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
A cute video. <3

Are you a type of person to stay in or go out?
Stay in. No question.

Are you capable of holding down a long-term relationship?
Yes. Forever. Though never had the chance.

Your ex says they never even liked you, you say?
Uh, no ex.

If something was wrong, who is the first girl you would go to?
My Mommy? Well, it depends.

Boy?
o.o; None? I guess Roy.

Where was the very last place you went besides your house?
Therapy office.

Last night did you go to bed smiling?
No way.

What were you doing last night at 11?
Crying.

Do you respect your elders?
Mostly. But not everyone deserves respect, so...

What woke you up this morning?
Was just natural.

When someone says "we need to talk," what runs through your mind?
Depends on the person?

Do you like getting big hugs?
I don't get many.

Do you think any of your ex's will eventually want to be with you again?
No exs.

Do you look at old pictures of yourself and laugh?
No, cry. ~_~;

Would you introduce the last person you kissed to your parents?
Haven't kissed anyone.

What do you think when someone kisses you on your forehead?
Uh, never happened?

Last thing you and your ex boyfriend/girlfriend talked about?
Again no exs.

Are you one of those people who never drink soda?
Pretty much never, yeah.

Be honest, do you like people in general?
...no. I love them and hate them... and it's all very messed up.

Have you ever found someone you really really really liked?
Uh, loved? Yeah, I've been in love.

When was the last time you had a real smile on your face?
...I don't know.

When was the last time you had a late night phone conversation?
Last night.

Do you ignore people when you're mad or upset with them?
Depends. I don't get mad often, though. And with most people, I would want to talk it out with them.

Do you honestly believe that good things come to those who wait?
It's hard... but I'm still waiting.

Would you get back together with an ex down the road?
No exs. ~_~;

How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?
...no one?

Would you go back and change any part of your life?
Only a coupld of things. I mostly don't regret what I've been through... I just want it to start getting better.

Is it easy to make you cry?
Extremely.

Did your last kiss take place on a bed?
Again. Never been kissed.

Do you have a reason to cry right now?
Always.

Aside from waking up, what was the first thing you did this morning?
Talked to Mommy.

The Lovers - Not a Surprise...

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 05:35:59 GMT

You are The Lovers

Motive, power, and action, arising from Inspiration and Impulse.

The Lovers represents intuition and inspiration. Very often a choice needs to be made.

Originally, this card was called just LOVE. And that's actually more apt than "Lovers." Love follows in this sequence of growth and maturity. And, coming after the Emperor, who is about control, it is a radical change in perspective. LOVE is a force that makes you choose and decide for reasons you often can't understand; it makes you surrender control to a higher power. And that is what this card is all about. Finding something or someone who is so much a part of yourself, so perfectly attuned to you and you to them, that you cannot, dare not resist. This card indicates that the you have or will come across a person, career, challenge or thing that you will fall in love with. You will know instinctively that you must have this, even if it means diverging from your chosen path. No matter the difficulties, without it you will never be complete.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Stolen from: melancholyjack.

Muse Murmers

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 17:40:24 GMT

Pretty much if you know anything about me, it's that I'm a writer. Or it should be, anyways. I've been writing in the literal sense since I was 10, but I was making up stories long before then. It's the second most important thing in my life. (First being finding Morgan. <3 )

So, if you are interested in my writing I will direct you to my creative community. muse_murmers. "Murmers" because I've always been bad at spelling, stupid me. Oh, well... that's what editors are for. ^_^; Right?

Anyways, the reason why I bring this up now is because my old Master Story Links post went and died on me. ~_~; I had to start it all over. Which was a decent little project, but I stupidly decided to turn it into a HUGE project. I reformatted all the old entries that were messed up do to my lazy copy-paste from Word and such. Found a decent simple layout with tag support built in. Then, with that, I went back and tagged all the entries... like I did here awhile ago. Matched all my stories with appropriate icons. And linked my Hate You, Hate Me entries together.

It was a three day project. I did take a break yesterday because I was starting to go crazy. But in the end, I think it was for the best... as long as I never have to do it again! ~_~;

Also the combination of reformatting HYHM and the recent Harry Potter movie has gotten me reinvigorated in fanfiction. During my day long break from the madness, I had to drop everything TWICE to write out some HYHM scenes. Well, one was for the sequel. HeH. But still. And I ended up with... 8 pages!! The most I've written at once since I can't remember. And though, I'm tired from finishing the community I feel the creative pull is still quite strong in me. ^_^

InuYasha Anime...

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Mon, 20 Jul 2009 13:07:11 GMT

Is coming back!!!

InuYasha to Return to TV

How did I not find out until now?? Oh, well. Only a few days off. <3 <3 <3 ^_^

I would fangirl more about this, but I must get some sleep so I can go to my second Half-Blood Prince showing. ^_^

That reminds me... need to post an entry about that, maybe? Hmm.

<3

Trapped Faith

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 09:51:15 GMT

I think I hate Religion.

My Uncle thinks I'm defective. Since he's Religious, he was preaching to me. About all the things that are "wrong". And I held back. It's his first day here... best not to ruin the whole week. Even though now I'm screaming on the inside.

He said anyone who doesn't want kids is defective. Well, I'm sorry... I don't. I don't feel called to have children. I would never dream of having an abortion, but I very sure I'm not meant to be a mother. And I refuse to think that's wrong. I can still remember when I first started discovering how the Catholic Faith felt about marriage and children. And how angry it made me feel. I asked to borrow the book we were reading for Theology and scanned in that page in disgust.

Then my Uncle went on to say how American culture has turned away from God, which has lead to homosexuality and even INTER-RACIAL relationships... Okay, what the Hell!? I get the homosexuality thing... (and by that, I mean I understand that it is taught to be wrong, not that I agree, because I absolutely do not!) but I was totally shocked that he's actually preaching against Inter-racial relationships. I wanted to scream at him.

But I held back, even though I feel like I just broke a glass vase and pushed the pieces into my chest.

And that's not the first Religious dispute I got into this week... although the first one was actually with someone who was respectful of my views. And that's a rarity, honestly. We talked about the children issue briefly. Though she didn't press her opinion after I told her I didn't feel called to have children.

But it turned somehow to priests getting married. Because I thought about it long and hard, and I just feel everyone has a soulmate. She really wouldn't budge on how she felt priests couldn't do the same work if they were married. I really didn't have any points to argue with that, but I still disagreed.

She agreed it was possible that they could have soulmates, but still, to do what they were called to do, they needed to stay single to be devoted to God's work. But the point I was getting at was that is if God was pretty much telling these people to give up a life with their soulmates... "Okay, then, I think that's just cruel." And I said it fighting tears... because the idea of that really hurt me that much.

Because I absolutely do believe in God. My God. No one Religion's God. I believe in a loving God. Not a God for which we have to suffer and sacrifice to please... but a God who delights in the spreading of love, caring, and respect through the world. That's what I believe in.

But the horrible thing is... I feel so trapped between the total non-believers and the strict religious. I am... me. But no one wants me to be me. They want me to be part of something else. To choose a side... when I think both sides are wrong. And it makes me want to scream...

"I feel so lost!"

Rule of Rose...

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 04:15:08 GMT

A story too cruel - too beautiful - to go untold...

Since I already kind of posted about it on Giant Bomb, I decided to go with this post first.

Once upon a time, Amazon.com put this game on my recommendations list. Reading about it, I was positive it was not my kind of game. Way too violent/scary for someone as sensitive as me. Fortunately-Unfortunately (depending on how you look at it... and I change my mind on a day-to-day basis), something got me hooked enough that I couldn't get it out of my mind. It sort of demented me cruelly. ~_~;

I figured it was one of those things where I couldn't forget about it, because I didn't know what happened. So, in order to free myself, I read the entire game script. And I was done...

For about a year and a half. Somehow, I began to think about the game again, and thought... oh, I was just blowing things out of proportion. It wasn't really all that scary... was it? And I thought maybe I could, at least, try watching it via YouTube.

However, in my researching of the game, I found an awesome website dedicated to figuring out the mysteries left behind in the game. And I found something in one of the blog posts that traumatized me so much that I had trouble being alone or at night for MONTHS.

Funny thing is, for me... watching the game (which I did do) is not nearly as scary as the mystery exploring that goes on at that site. There's some blood and creepy imps,*shivers*, yes, but what you actually see in the game is not nearly as bad as what you can see in your mind... if you really take the time to think about.

Anyways, I finally bought the game... and someday I will try to play it, but... it's probably not a good idea. Especially not alone. ~_~; But I do spend lots of time on that site. I've read every post I keep pretty up-to-date with what's being talked about. It really is awesome.

Ah, I'm torn. I want to try playing it... but I get freaked out so easily. It's not like I don't know what's coming, having watched the whole thing, but I'm sure it's more scary playing it. And at the time when I did watch it, it probably wasn't too bad only in comparision to what my mind was seeing just about constantly. But I'm not seeing that very much anymore.

Someone come play it with me? <3

I'm Alive! (Sickness and E3 ramblings)

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 21:28:09 GMT

So, I got really sick. Yes, it was just a cold, but... it totally knocked me over. I had to cancel my little birthday party and everything. ~_~; I couldn't sleep, much like the cold I had last July. So, it was just miserable.

The ironic thing was, when I was finally starting to get better, it was time for E3. (Which if you don't know, I'm always glued to the coverage of.) That's the same thing that happened last time around. o.o; So I was watching my press conferences with a box of tissues again. Ah, well... at least both times I was on the recovering side.

The Microsoft press conference was first. I showed my Mom The Beatles Rock Band video they showed at the start of it, and she liked it so much that she downloaded it off of YouTube. HeH. I of course, enjoyed the Final Fantasy 13 demo they showed, though I'm probably getting it for the PS3, sorry, Microsoft. I think the Project Natal stuff has the potiental to be cool too. (Though I would never want to play all games in that fashion.) And I really want to be friends with Milo. Yes, I'm lonely... so what?

Last week really was a crazy week, because The Sims 3 was released as well. I only barely had time to get the game and install it on Tuesday before the conferences started up again. Nintendo was first. Showing New Super Mario Bros. for Wii right off the bat. Which I thought was a very good idea. It inspired me to finally finish up the DS version. HeH. Super Mario Galaxy 2 was also announced. Yoshi! <3 Which is cool... still haven't even started the first one, though. ~_~; Oops. I will, though! Soon... I hope.

And Sony was the last of "The Big Three" as they like to say. And there was a Final Fantasy 13 trailer. Then, the first announcement of Final Fantasy 14. People gasped... including me. And then, I thought... oh, wait... it's online isn't it? And right I was. How sad. Don't charge to play, and I'll totally buy the game, Square-Enix. Otherwise, forget it. Yours Sadly, Valerie.

They also talked about the PSP Go, which I personally think is too small and smashed together, but that's just me. Plus, I like having physical copies of my stuff. That's just how I am. They showed their next step in motion control. I'm starting to think Heavy Rain looks cool. Maybe too dark for me. Hmmm. I don't know. :/ Also LittleBigPlanet for PSP. <3

Here's a great look at each of the days if you want more: Pre-Show (Day 0), Day 1, Day 2, Day 3. Yes, I do love you, Giant Bomb.

Sooo, there you are. *Fingers die* I am still hoping to post more often, honestly. I just keep getting thrown off by this or that.

Coming soon (I hope):
The Sims 3-ness (I have finally played it.)
Rule of Rose-ness. *Shivers* (I... bought it.)

Photobucket Issues

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Fri, 15 May 2009 18:35:32 GMT

*Sighs* I finally decided to make an icon post after more than a year... oops. Anyways, Photobucket is what I've usually used but it's giving me all sort of problems. It keeps freezing when I try to upload my icons. ~_~; I tried on both IE and Firefox, but still doesn't work. And I've nocticed some other people's images from photobucket are not showing up. So, are they having issues or something? I've tried the last couple of days too.

For some reason I seem determined to get these icons up. o.O; And it's driving me crazy that I can't. I suppose I could try something else. Hm.

Edit: Ten days laaater...Finally.

Company and The Sims 3

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Sat, 09 May 2009 03:29:35 GMT

Hi, there. I've been busy lately. Truthfully, while it's weird for me to be busy, but not always a bad weird. *Shrugs*

I had a ton of company staying here for 5 days. I was so scared that I'd be going crazy with 8 people in our house, but it worked out surprisingly well. My Uncle John and Aunt Denise, cousins Brian and Andrea, and Andrea's almost 2-year-old son, Ethan. He's so sweet! ^_^ I spent as much time with him as I could. When just John, Denise, and Ethan visited in the Fall, it was lovely. But I was worried that so many people at once would overload me. Especially because last week, I seemed even more emotional than usual... which, wow. That's really saying something.

Anyways, it worked out great most of the time. Going out most nights to eat got a little crazy, but other than that it was fine... and fun. The whole Texas group hasn't been here all at once in many years, I think. And now they have Ethan. <3 Awww. Ethan. I love him so.

Even my sleep schedule behaved well. o.o; Until the last night, at least. Brian and I stayed up until 2:30. I really haven't seen him more than briefly in a great many years. It's hard being around a guy for me, though. ~_~; Not just embarrassing, but... stupid, Hachi-ness. It wasn't completely terrible, though. It was fun talking video games and tech stuff, going to game stores, messing with his new iPhone and such. ^///^; But really, Hachi. Stop that, please.

And speaking of video games... okay, I finally decided to break down and preorder The Sims 3 as my birthday gift. I totally hate myself for it, though. I was so, SO mad when I found of all the things they were changing. I like playing one house at a time. I like micromanaging things. ~_~; Apparently, I'm the minority. As per usual. I love The Sims 2. The formula has been done to perfection. I never wanted a Sims 3 to exist. I could live on happily with Sims 2 expansions forever.

However, there are some cool elements to it. You can choose from a bunch of different Personality Traits. I've heard there's a trait you can choose that's "vegan". <3 <3 <3 And "Romantic". Hehe. So, it will be fun making myself and Morgan. <3 And making our little love story. *Sighs*

...*Cough* Um, anyways. I just have to think of it as a completely different game. As long as I think that way, I'll be fine. I don't have to stop playing The Sims 2 just because I'm getting The Sims 3. And I won't, believe me. I have thousands of Sims, with crazy, wonderful, interweaving stories. I'd never give them up. <3 But that doesn't mean I can't embrace some new Sims 3 Sims and stories. HeH.

My Mom told me to just think of it as the next Final Fantasy. I don't have to replace FF10 with FF12. I can love both! (And I do!) That was really surprisingly insightful of her... I mean, considering it was about video games. ^_^;

The simming formula really has been done to perfection for me. And I guess that's why they have to move in a different direction now.

Breaking Dawn...

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Sun, 22 Mar 2009 20:49:29 GMT

There are so many angry people in the world. That I understand. I do. There are terrible things happening everyday. It's so hard. But my God, for someone as sensitive as me, the anger that occurs over things like this actually makes me sick.

But maybe it's because I just don't understand. Because I liked it. In fact, I loved it at times. That's not to say that things didn't totally catch me off guard. Still, I'm to the point where I just can't accept the general reaction (even though, I have to). I don't understand why people are so upset...

It ends happily? And this upsets people why...? Because they're not happy? Hey, guess what? *Raises hand* Totally not happy over here. :( In fact, miserable on a pretty much daily basis.

I have no problem with a difference of opinion, in general. I'm upset purely with the way so many people reacted negatively to a happy ending in Breaking Dawn (and Deathly Hallows, for that matter), because it's sucking the soul out of me. I'm too sensitive, I know. But so much negativity takes a toll on me.

*Sighs* I'm not really trying to change anything. I know I don't have that power anyways. I'm not even ready to talk about the book itself (if anyone even cares). I'm just too drained now. For now, I'll just say that I liked it. Of course, I did. I like most things. I have the ability of liking so many things. And it's a gift. Honestly, it is. I'm so, so grateful to not be someone on the other side. Someone who rarely enjoys anything. This is so much better.

But I will say this on another issue reguarding the book... if the eventual romance of Jacob/Renesmee (By the way, I didn't mind that name either. Even though I can't spell it! Take that.) upsets or digusts you, never, ever read my Timeline universe. Just don't. Because while I feel it's assumed that Jacob will wait until Nessie has reached her full maturity to change his relationship with her, some of my characters will certainly not. I will most certainly push the envelop, as it were, on "acceptable" soulmates in more ways than that. And there is a quite a similar circumstance with a daughter of a former loved one.

Well, there you are... that's your warning. Not that you'd need it.

So, I'll leave with an actual review of the book that I agree with. And just say again how sorry I feel for those who dislike things so much. And if anyone feels I'm silly (or worse) for enjoying things so much, I'll just say I know who wins out in the end. ^_^

By the way, remind me to never write this upset while so tired again. Thanks.

The Playstation 3...

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Thu, 19 Mar 2009 03:10:25 GMT

...is mine. After lots of saving of money, and lots of searching for a backwards compatiable PS3... I got it! Hurray! I now have all current generation systems and handhelds. ^_^ But now, just wait, come E3... they'll start annoucing the next versions of everything, so I have to start saving all over again. ~_~; Please, no.

Ah, anyways, at this moment I only have LittleBigPlanet. Which is awesome. But that's it. And that's the only game I even know of that's out right now that I want. (Other than the downloadable Flower.)

So, for the last time for awhile, PS3 game recs, please? Keep in mind, I really don't like anything too violent. Far too sensitive.

Recommend here, please. Any other recs while there are also welcome. Thank you!

Also, do all girls get completely swamped by jerks on Home? I suppose I did expect it somewhat, but wow.

Writing Again!

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 10:58:35 GMT

Last week... was a strangely good week for me. Okay, so... nothing really happened, but I was in an above decent mood. Especially Thursday because it was warm. I was just about giddy that day. I got to have the window open for the first time in months. The fresh air was just intoxicating. And I wrote that day too.

For almost a year, I was doing pretty well with writing at least once a week, but I totally crashed around November. ~_~; Since then, it's been more like once every other week. (Not that I haven't been working on ideas in my head, I do that every day.) What with the GED and Christmas and all that. *Dies* But I've finally done two weeks in a row again! Hurray!

So, then I realized it's time to get back to my one journal post per week... though, maybe I should wait to push for that until I'm positive the writing is back to normal. ~_~; Oh, well... for now, I actually feel like typing sooo... ^_^

So, I've mentioned previously about wondering if anyone on my Friends List would be interested in reading my original stories. I still kind of want to try that, but... it's really hard for me to trust putting my novels online even under Friend's Lock. I'm super paranoid. ~_~; Plus, I always handwrite my stories. I have scanned in pages for my really close friends, but I hate typing. I won't do that until I finish handwriting most of the time.

But I have been willing to type prologues and summaries. So, maybe... is anyone really interested? If so, maybe I'll make a little Friend's Locked post talking some about the two stories I'm writing at the moment. (And by that, I mean writing literally, because I probably have 100 or so stories in development.)

Other than getting back to my writing, I've been playing lots Kingdom Hearts - Re: Chain of Memories (Is that how you write it? o.o; ) and Gaia Online's zOMG. HeH.

FullMetal Alchemist - Ed/Nana

cricket_val@hotmail.com — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 12:48:57 GMT

So, there's going to be a new FullMetal Alchemist anime soon. I'm very excited, but after watching this very short video, I realized I'm going to have to wait for the anime to be dubbed before getting to see it. Not only did I watch the whole first series in English dub, but It's just too strange to hear Nana's voice (Romi Paku) as Ed. Haha.

But that's okay. I think the English cast is fabulous. (Hopefully, they'll be sticking to it. - I would assume so.) And this will give me some time to actually read the manga on which it will be more faithfully based. I have the first volume, I just need to sit down and get to it. (Though I really should read Breaking Dawn first. I must stop putting that off eventually... I just hate when things end. :( )

So that's my little random thought for today. *Wanders off*